When this woman’s brother suddenly found himself in serious financial trouble after reportedly squandering a large inheritance left by their parents, he apparently expected his sister to step in and rescue him. Their parents had worked hard throughout their lives and had eventually divided their assets between their children, giving both siblings an opportunity to build a more secure future. While the woman reportedly treated her share carefully, her brother took a very different approach. According to the story, he spent much of his inheritance on expensive purchases, unnecessary upgrades, vacations, and other things he could not realistically afford to maintain. For a while, he appeared to be enjoying the money without worrying about what would happen once it was gone. Unfortunately, the inheritance did not last forever. Eventually, his spending reportedly caught up with him, leaving him with mounting bills and little money left to cover them. When his financial situation became desperate, he turned to his sister and apparently asked her to bail him out. She refused, explaining that their parents had left him an inheritance specifically so he could use it responsibly and secure his own future. She reportedly felt that giving him more money would not solve the underlying problem and would only encourage the same behavior again.

The brother allegedly did not take the refusal well. Instead of accepting responsibility for his financial decisions, he reportedly argued that his sister was in a better position to help and that family members were supposed to support one another during difficult times. The woman understood the idea of helping family, but she believed there was a significant difference between helping someone through an unexpected crisis and repeatedly rescuing someone from the consequences of their own choices. She reportedly reminded her brother that he had received the same opportunity she had and that nobody had forced him to spend the money so quickly. According to her, she had made sacrifices and planned carefully because she understood that the inheritance was not simply free money—it was part of what their parents had intended to leave behind for their children. The brother, however, reportedly believed she was being selfish. He allegedly complained that she was sitting comfortably with her savings while he was struggling, and he apparently expected her to give up part of her own financial security to repair the damage he had created. The woman reportedly refused, believing that doing so would be unfair both to herself and to the memory of their parents.

Things reportedly became even more heated when the brother’s wife, the woman’s sister-in-law, became involved. Rather than blaming her husband for spending the inheritance, the SIL allegedly turned her anger toward the woman. She reportedly accused the sister of abandoning the family when they needed her most and suggested that she could easily prevent the situation from getting worse if she simply opened her wallet. According to the story, the SIL argued that the inheritance had originally come from their parents and that the family should therefore share resources when one member was struggling. The woman reportedly disagreed completely. She pointed out that her brother had already received his share and had chosen how to spend it. She had not taken his inheritance away from him, nor had she encouraged him to waste it. She had simply managed her own portion differently. The SIL allegedly continued insisting that the woman had a responsibility to help because she still had money left, even though the woman believed that her savings represented years of careful financial decisions rather than money that was available for someone else to claim. The argument reportedly became so intense that the woman began questioning whether her brother and SIL viewed her as a family member or simply as a backup bank account.

The woman reportedly tried one final time to explain her position without completely cutting her brother off. She told him that she was willing to help in non-financial ways, such as helping him create a budget, find additional work, reduce unnecessary expenses, or speak with a financial professional about managing his debts. What she would not do, however, was hand over a large amount of her own money simply because he had exhausted his inheritance. She reportedly believed that real help sometimes means refusing to make someone’s problem disappear. If she paid his debts, there was no guarantee he would change his spending habits. In fact, she worried that rescuing him could teach him that there would always be someone willing to absorb the consequences of his decisions. Her brother reportedly rejected those alternatives and insisted that money was the only solution he needed. His wife allegedly supported him and continued blaming the woman for refusing to provide financial assistance. The sister reportedly found the accusation deeply hurtful because she had already lost her parents and had carefully protected the portion of their legacy that had been entrusted to her. She did not believe that preserving her own inheritance made her responsible for her brother’s financial mistakes.

Ultimately, the woman decided that she would stand by her decision even if it damaged her relationship with her brother and sister-in-law. She reportedly felt guilty about watching someone she loved struggle, but she also believed that guilt was not a good enough reason to sacrifice her own financial stability. Their parents had left both children something valuable, and she believed the fairest way to honor them was to use her share responsibly rather than allow it to disappear fixing someone else’s mistakes. The situation reportedly left the family divided, with some relatives arguing that siblings should always help one another and others believing that adults must take responsibility for their own financial decisions. The woman continued to maintain that she was not refusing to help her brother because she did not care about him. She was refusing to bail him out because she cared enough not to enable the behavior that had created the crisis in the first place. Now the relationship between the siblings appears to depend on whether the brother and SIL can eventually accept that his inheritance was his responsibility—and that his sister’s savings were never meant to become his second inheritance.

Read Story…

Receive a hefty inheritance, blow it in 6 months, EB comes crawling to his sibling begging for money

Firstly, I’d like to thank you all for the great feedback on my other sordid tales from my past (EB aka Entitled Brother using his kids to screw me out of money, The Great Dim Sum Incident of 2013™ aka TGDSI2K13, and the Great Life Insurance Scandal aka TGLIS). These posts aren’t a means to gloat, but they’re a form of therapy that is a lot more affordable than seeing a shrink. My work benefit package kinda sucks that way.

It’s pretty clear I have some unresolved issues.

Those of you who have read TGLIS will be interested to know this incident follows shortly afterward, probably about a year and a half later. Should also note, I’m a fairly new Redditor and these stories are not always in chronological order unless stated otherwise.

So… after the dust settled a bit, the godawful task of settling the estate was next.

Dad was a very hardworking man, and despite his faults (hey, we all have them, and if you believe otherwise, you’re a goddamn liar) he managed to provide for a family of six with a roof over our heads, good food on the table and the creature comforts that we all sometimes take for granted. When he and Mom passed, they left us two kids (EB and myself) with a considerable sum, with the intention to give us a comfortable head start in life. It wasn’t a staggering amount by today’s standards, but definitely enough for a starter home for each of us (this was well before the housing crisis came to be).

I was newly married, and felt the best way to handle this newfound inheritance was to invest in a modest home free and clear, pay off all commercial debt (thankfully my husband and I are good that way and didn’t have much consumer debt) and a vehicle to replace my little jalopy. There was even enough to put a downpayment on a vehicle for hubby. Despite my parents being gone, I was in a good place, all things considered. I didn’t care if I didn’t have two nickels to rub together; we were both working FT and had a house fully paid for.

EB received the same amount. He, too, decided to invest in a new home and a new-used vehicle. Very smart use of his portion. Or so I thought.

About 6 months later, I received a disturbing phone call from EB, saying he was broke and needed money. I was incredulous. He was also looking for a new place to live. What happened to his house?

Then the bomb was dropped. He admitted he had given up his house to foreclosure. Instead of buying his place outright, he instead placed a 10% downpayment and decided to mortgage the rest. This tactic will work only if you don’t mind losing a shit ton of money to interest, AND if you intend to, you know, make your mortgage payments. He had neither.

After being notified by the bank about his sad state of affairs, he was given an incredible gift: because EB was a new homeowner, the bank was willing to make a one-time concession – pay two months of outstanding mortgage payments up front, and the rest would be tacked onto the amortization period.

Seriously, that shit never happens. It was a gift from some unseen entity that took pity on this piece of shit.

And you know what he said? “Nah, take the house.”

TAKE THE HOUSE.

So he was able to sell the house for a 3k profit, and then decided to rent some shitty apartment, where he remains to this day. I don’t know where his money went, and it’s really none of my business, but I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t curious.

So you’re probably asking where the entitlement comes in.

EB: I’m short rent.

Me: Oh, this again?

EB: This is serious. We’re going to be evicted if I can’t come up with rent by end of week.

SIL aka sister in law (screeching in the background): SHE OWES US MONEY!

sigh

I should backtrack a bit. When the estate was settled, I petitioned for a small portion of EB’s share (about 10k), to cover the following items, among other things:

• cleaning out the family home, including performing repairs to prepare the house for sale;
• arranging for both funeral services since EB went AWOL;
• my paying for both grave markers out of pocket since EB refused to pitch in for what dad’s policy couldn’t cover;
• my paying for legal fees in relation to the execution of both wills and settling the estate.

I should note that EB, in a moment of clarity, agreed to this arrangement without hesitation, even though I made it very clear that he was under no obligation. I thought that would be the end of it.

SIL wouldn’t have it. She accused me of stealing from EB his ‘rightful share’ and that I had ‘such nerve’ to be so selfish to DEMAND money from them when it was ‘totally undeserved’. This coming from the same woman who paraded through my parents’ home on the day of mom’s funeral, pointing out shit she wanted.

I jokingly bet my husband that EB would go through his inheritance within a year while hubby said 6 months. I still owe him a fancy steak dinner since I lost the bet.

Anyway, back to the rent story, all I could do was tell EB that I simply couldn’t afford to pay his rent since I had tuition to pay for (and that my husband can’t stand him but I didn’t tell him that). He didn’t end up getting evicted, so he either found another sucker, or he had the money squirreled away and was just trying to find a way to get more money out of me. SIL will make a sniping comment now and then about how “well off” we are at their expense (she still claims that their financial downfall is somehow my fault as opposed to their atrocious money handling skills). The most important thing is they never did get kicked out, but I’m still dumbfounded and appalled at how this whole shitstorm played out.

I honestly wish I COULD say that these stories are fabricated but sadly, they are not. And even more sadly, there’s more in that tiny library I call a brain. May post more later.

Thanks for reading.